If you really think about it, we all have learning and thinking differences. No two people learn and think in exactly the same way. If they did, the world would be far less interesting. Still, whether or not your child has an "official" learning difference, it’s important to talk to him or her about these differences.
Historically, lots of well-meaning parents thought it was best to shield their children from knowing about their learning challenges. This was especially true of students who had diagnosed disabilities. Luckily, times are changing. The parental reflex about children's disabilities is starting to shift from embarrassment to empowerment. Being “neurodiverse” is no longer something to be ashamed of.
Even if your child is considered “neurotypical,” this conversation is still relevant to you. It’s still important for your child to understand that people learn and think and even act differently from she does. Have conversations about what neurodiversity is. Talk about the ways in which neurodiversity benefits us as a society. This is the best way to prepare your child to be the empathetic and compassionate person she is capable of being.
Be as transparent as possible as early as possible
Discussing learning and thinking differences with your child should not be a one-time thing. The more you talk with your child about differences of all kinds, the more normal they become. When we “shield” our kids from understanding neurodiversity (theirs or others'), we are likely doing more harm than good. Children inevitably find out about their learning differences, often at a much older age. When this happens, they are usually either embarrassed or relieved. Finding out there is a reason for their struggles in school can come as a huge epiphany to some kids.
Use age-appropriate levels of complexity
Of course, you’ll navigate the topic differently with a 5-year-old than you would with a 15-year-old. The older your child becomes, the more specific you can get in your discussions. For very young children, whether they have a learning difference or not, use mostly vague and general language in your conversations. For older children, you can begin to be more specific in terms of the names of disabilities and the ways in which they usually affect people.
Look to characters on TV
Even Sesame Street is evolving! If you haven’t met Julia yet, she is the most recent addition to the Sesame Street cast and she is a monster with autism. Kids learn a lot from Julia, regardless of whether or not they have a diagnosed disability. Including Julia in the Sesame Street cast shows her in a light that celebrates her differences as unique gifts and not as a "disability".