Reading Resources for Kids of Military Parents

Military kids move often and experience emotional stress that can impact their ability to learn to read. However, books are one of the best ways for these kids to process their emotions and learn to face life with courage. 

As a teacher or tutor, you want your students to succeed, and you recognize that military students face more challenges than many other young kids. Teaching them to read will give them tools for handling the stress of life and succeeding in school. 

Reading stories about other military families can encourage kids that they aren’t alone and spark a life-long love of reading. Here are three types of reading resources for children of military parents that you can use to support the families and students with whom you work.

1. Processing Loneliness

There are many children’s books that have been written to help military families process the loneliness and confusion kids may feel during a parent’s deployment. Although many of these books are geared toward younger children, having access to them can also help older kids and teenagers understand their own emotions. 

You can assign these books as reading material or arrange a reading program where older students can read to younger children. Although it’s unlikely that all your students come from military families, loneliness is a universal emotion, and these stories will teach empathy and compassion toward classmates.

• I Love You Near and Far by Marjorie Blain Parker

This children’s book tells the story of a military family experiencing separation due to deployment. The family is depicted as cats, and the story makes parallels between missing a deployed loved one and missing a grandparent who lives far away. This book is an encouraging reminder that love can be strong even if the person you love is very far away. 

• Night Catch by Brenda Ehrmantraut

Written in rhyme, this story describes a father and son who play catch with a star every night until the father returns from deployment. They blow the north star back and forth as a way to remind each other that the world is smaller than it seems, and they are never far from each other’s thoughts. 

2. Studying the Military 

It may also help your students to spend time learning about the military. That way, they’ll have a better understanding of what their parent is doing overseas and why it’s so important. Of course, it’s important to be sensitive toward students and only discuss age-appropriate topics. 

Teachers can use military stories to supplement their curriculum and help kids understand the purpose, history, and value of the military in the United States. Although they won’t reduce students’ loneliness for deployed parents, these books can help students feel proud to be part of a military family. 

• Hero Mom and Hero Dad by Melinda Hardin 

These basic picture books describe the different jobs military parents may be doing overseas. The pages describe roles like building, flying helicopters, moving trucks, and working in medical settings. In addition to describing roles, this book emphasizes the courage and dedication of military parents. 

• H Is For Honor by Devin Scillian

Based on the alphabet, each page in this book describes the challenges military families face and teaches readers about several military terms, military branches, and military traditions. This book is an excellent read for elementary kids and will give your students context for what their parent’s life is like.  

3. Understanding PTSD

A list of books for military kids wouldn’t be complete without resources for families affected by PTSD. It can be very difficult for kids to understand that their parent is still fighting an internal battle even after they get home. 

These stories are a great way to introduce students to the topic of mental health. They also promote empathy and will help students learn that any anger or stress their military parent is feeling is not their fault. 

• My Daddy Has PTSD by Miranda Watson and James Rosone

This book tells the story of a very small girl who learns that her Daddy is experiencing PTSD. This is a great resource to introduce the concept of trauma to young children. However, it’s important to be sensitive and avoid worrying kids about something that may not happen. 

• Wounded by Eric Walters

Written for older students, this story describes how PTSD can affect every member of a military family. The reading level and quality content make this an incredibly helpful resource for students who have a family member suffering from PTSD. However, because it deals with mature themes, it’s important to screen this book before you assign it. 

Supporting Your Students

Many military students experience prolonged separation from a parent and the emotional stress of frequent moves. As a teacher, you can support military students best by igniting their love of reading with relatable and encouraging stories about military families. 

Use this list to start incorporating military fiction into your curriculum, and be sure to encourage parents to read to their kids. This bonding time can help families process their emotions and give them a sense of security that will translate to their wellbeing, in and out of school.

Strategies for Building Resilience

Resilience is an important skill that no one is born with. Kids who have skills in resilience are able to bounce back from disappointment sooner. They often overcome obstacles more successfully, and are more likely to persevere through challenges. Here are some of the ways we can help children build these important skills in class and at home.

1. Instill a Growth Mindset

Students who have a growth mindset view their ability to learn as evolving. They know that intelligence is not fixed and that they can succeed with hard work and effort. Students with a fixed mindset, on the other hand, might look at a poor grade and see it as a reflection of their capabilities. But a student with a growth mindset might look at that same grade and see it as an opportunity to learn. They might see it as a signal that they did not study hard enough on a test, or work hard enough on a project. Students with a growth mindset face their mistakes and failures head on and attempt to learn from them.

2. Model Positive Self-Talk

Students with more confidence and self-esteem are always more resilient. One of the best ways to build confidence is to model how students should talk to and about themselves. This is called positive self-talk, and students learn it best through example. When the adults around them talk about themselves in positive and encouraging ways, kids learn to do the same.

3. Encourage Healthy Risk-Taking

We don’t often think of “risks” as something we should encourage. But healthy risk-taking doesn’t mean putting oneself in unsafe or perilous situations. Taking healthy risks means embracing those situations that push us outside of our emotional or intellectual comfort zone. This might include trying a brand new activity we’ve never done before, or presenting in front of a group of people when we are scared of public speaking. The more we can encourage students to take these healthy types of risks, the more resilient they’ll become.

4. Help Build Coping Skills and Teach Emotional IQ

In order to become more resilient, students need to develop coping skills for those times when they face challenges and difficulties. This requires the self-awareness to recognize when they are becoming overwhelmed or stressed beyond productivity. When these feelings arise, students need mechanisms for bringing themselves back to a calm state, like a mantra or breathing strategy. This recognition and these tools require developing emotional awareness and intelligence. The best promote this awareness in students is to frequently use language that describes emotions and offer students plenty of structured opportunities to talk about their feelings using relevant vocabulary.

5. Let Kids Learn How to Problem Solve On Their Own

Sometimes our best intentions lead us to try to solve all of our children’s problems for them. When we see our students or our own kids in any kind of unrest or distress, we just want to fix it for them. But that doesn’t teach them how to face these problems on their own, which they will eventually need to learn how to do. We can begin letting kids solve their own problems by modeling the process and by being there to guide and support, but not spoon-feed them the solution every time they encounter conflict.

Strategies for Improving Reading Fluency

Reading fluency refers to a student’s ability to read in a way that sounds natural. It includes students’ reading rate, the expression with which they read, and the accuracy of what they are reading. Fluency is separate from the skills of decoding and comprehension. Students can have strong decoding and comprehension skills and weak fluency or vice versa. Exposure to these three areas certainly helps strengthen each in turn. However, practicing reading with a focus on decoding and comprehension exclusively does not guarantee improved fluency.

Fluency is an important part of becoming a competent reader. When a student struggles with fluency, it is likely that other areas of her reading may suffer. For students who struggle with accuracy, the meaning that they make of their reading becomes skewed. And when students read slowly, often due to a lack of sight word knowledge or labored decoding, they retain less. Finally, when they read without expression, it can have a negative impact on their reading comprehension. 

Here are some ways you can help students strengthen their reading fluency:

Model Fluent Reading

When modeling what fluent reading sounds like, it’s important to include a wide variety of text types. This way, you provide students with exposure to lots of different ways to read expressively. The expression we use when reading dramatic fiction is very different from that which we use when reading a news story. The younger the students, the more often they should be hearing what good, fluent reading sounds like.

Echo Reading

A great way to get kids to practice reading fluently is to let them copy exactly how you do it. This is called Echo Reading. When students are able to hear you model fluent reading and then immediately practice it themselves, they are more likely to use proper expression, rate, and accuracy. Echo reading can be effective in both one-on-one settings as well as in groups.

Reader’s Theater

One of the first ways young children learn how their reading should sound is through stories. This is why using reader’s theater to allow students to practice their reading is an excellent method for improving fluency. Whereas regular stories are told in a narrative format, Reader’s Theater allows students to take on a role in the story as they are reading it. This reading role-play encourages them to speak as their character would speak, which makes reading with expression feel more natural.

Build sight word knowledge

Sometimes a student’s struggle with fluency is related to weak sight word knowledge. When this is the case, it is important to strengthen the students’ ability to recognize sight words, as well as increase the number of sight words. While it used to be thought that sight words needed to be “memorized,” the best way for students to really internalize sight words is through the process of orthographic mapping.

Use visuals in text for breaks, pauses, inflections, etc.

Most of us know that when we come to a period in a text, we need to pause in order to communicate to ourselves or to our listener that we’ve reached the end of a complete thought. Some students have a much harder time remembering what that period means, or even noticing it at all. While real-world texts won’t include any extra visuals beyond punctuation marks and text styles, some students benefit from a little extra coding in their text to help remind them what their reading should sound like. This can include a color-coded set of additional symbols that tell the student when to pause (when there is a period), when to inflect their voice up (when there is a question mark), when to emphasize a word (italics or bold), etc.

Identify natural phrases in text

Another strategy that can help students learn how to group words more naturally as they are reading is to specifically look for natural phrasing in text and circle those phrases. This takes modeling for students to do correctly, but once they are familiar with the process it can go a long way in eventually helping them apply the skill of identifying phrases to their reading naturally.

Closing Learning Gaps

Educators everywhere are feeling the stress of trying to “catch kids up” after the last two years of learning loss. Here’s how some of the best teachers are tackling these learning gaps most effectively.

1. Building Trust and Connection

It’s more true than ever that students need to feel a connection with teachers in order to learn from them. When a student doesn’t trust and feel connected to a teacher, his or her learning suffers. Investing the time and energy into connecting with each and every student, whether they are part of a larger classroom or receive instruction one-on-one, ensures that their learning will be that much more meaningful.

2. Maximizing Downtime

While students definitely need breaks from rigorous academics and time to process new information, that doesn’t mean that their brains have to turn off. The best teachers are using these “break” times to embed academic practice into games, conversations, activities, and low-stakes tasks so that their students’ brains are always on and working productively. In the classroom, this might look like a math game during snack time, or a “morning work challenge” at arrival. These tasks should allow some release from the routine, while reducing transition time back into work mode by keeping kids engaged.

3. Showing the Relevance

Kids are always more likely to learn (and WANT to learn) when they understand why they are learning and how it applies to their lives. While this applies to all subject areas, it is often especially difficult for students to see the relevance of certain math concepts. When a student thinks, ‘I’ll never use this,’ she isn’t going to put much energy into learning it. The best teachers show students how each concept applies to their lives and the real world.

4. Creating Systems of Intervention and Meeting Students Where They Are

In a typical school year, some teachers can get away with teaching a “one-size-fits-all” model.  They have a curriculum to get through, and they have planned out the way in which they will deliver that curriculum to students. This approach to teaching rarely works for all kids, and that’s especially true now. The best instructional design for these times (and all times, for that matter) involves constantly assessing where students are in their skill development and creating structured and systematic routines of intervention for those students who need more targeted resources than the “one-size-fits-all” approach can provide.

The best teachers are also resisting the urge to keep to a specific pace in their instruction. When teachers move forward regardless of how students are doing, many inevitably fall through the cracks. Instead, teachers must meet students where they are and help them advance from there.

Helping Kids Build Social Skills

You won’t necessarily find a social skills lesson on every classroom’s daily schedule. And yet, a vast majority of young students need some level of instruction in how to do things like cooperate, share, play, take turns, and converse. This is especially true for students with ADHD, Social Anxiety and Social Pragmatic Communication Disorder. Interacting positively and productively with others isn’t something that comes naturally to many kids, and for some, it’s extra challenging. That’s why we were so excited to talk to Speech-Language Pathologists Tara Ferrara and Alexandra Spira of Social City. Listen to how they help kids develop these crucial skills through social groups, and read below for some highlights!

Key Takeaways

• From a speech pathologist’s lens, speech and language skills can be split into three main categories:

  • Receptive Language: these are skills that have to do with understanding what others are saying (also includes reading comprehension).

  • Expressive Language: these are skills related to speaking and communicating, writing, retelling a story, and articulating one’s thoughts.

  • Pragmatic Language: these are conversation skills as well as nonverbal communication cues like facial expression, body language, tone of voice, etc.

    • Social skills groups focus on developing pragmatic language skills.

• Why is it so important for students to be able to read social cues and understand nonverbal communication?

  • Students who often feel targeted or frequently bullied by peers are usually misreading social cues.

  • Students who have difficulty with these skills engage in one-sided conversations, don’t notice when others lose interest, and need support in having reciprocal conversations.

• The best way to help students develop social skills: Role Play!

  • Using role play to act out scenarios with different outcomes can help students compare and evaluate these different outcomes in a low-stakes setting.

  • It prepares them to be successful in real-life scenarios when they come up.

• How can you tell if your students need social skill support?

  • They struggle to express themselves emotionally and engage socially

  • They frequently keep to themselves

  • They don’t know how to read social cues, have trouble working in a group, taking turns, managing emotions, etc.

Addressing the "COVID Gap"

You've probably heard of the "Summer Slide." This is what we call the learning loss that typically occurs over the summer months when students don't practice skills. It's very common, it happens every year, and with most students, it's resolved by October or November. The COVID gap refers to learning loss caused by the many interruptions to classroom learning since the COVID-19 pandemic began.

Some research has come out on just how significant the learning loss has been. However, the specific depth and breadth of the loss ranges based on things like demographics, grade level, and geography. What the gap is actually measuring is also unclear. It doesn't measure the distance between groups of students, since so many students are experiencing some level of learning loss. The gap is measuring the distance between where students are performing and where teachers think they should be performing. This is based on national and state standards, curricular benchmarks, and sometimes teachers’ own personal beliefs about what students should be able to do.

Supporting Students with Interrupted Learning

For students whose learning has been disrupted by COVID, there are some small ways to limit the negative impact. Aside from missing out on quality academics, another problem with these interruptions is the lack of routine. Any time kids are out of their regular routine, it's hard to get back into it. And yet, a majority of kids thrive with the regularity of a predictable routine. At home, try to maintain a schedule as close to their regular routine as possible.

Parents are often tempted to make up lost academics by supplementing with extra work. We should, however, be mindful about how we go about this. Assigning extra “busy work” or work that students don’t feel motivated to do or invested in could have the opposite effect. It could cause children to resent learning even more. Instead of buying boring workbooks or printing out practice worksheets, try to work with your child to develop some long-term at-home projects they will be enthusiastic about. Here are some great ideas to get you started.

Will the Gap Ever Close?

While we can't close gaps in learning overnight, there's good news: just about everyone is behind. Those few who aren't currently behind grade level expectations were probably already ahead before the pandemic began. So while the COVID gap is real, and while it is alarming, it isn't the end of the world. The focus needs to shift from "catching kids up" to meeting them where they are to ensure they move forward. They'll keep learning and growing as long as educators and parents continue to encourage that learning and growth in gentle, stress-free ways.

If you need some extra help to support your child, our tutors are ready to work with your child to fill the gaps and reignite their spark for learning.

8 Great Books to Teach Kids About Responsibility

Reading books about responsibility can help kids develop character in their own lives. Children naturally imitate what they see, and books are the perfect tool for observing responsible behavior and then discussing it.

Kids' books that talk about money can also help children learn to be responsible with their finances. Many kids’ books about responsibility include other important themes of friendship, courage, and sacrifice.

Here’s a list of eight books you can read with kids to teach them about responsibility.

1. Bunny Money

This book is part of the “Max and Ruby” series written by Rosemary Wells. In this installment of the series, the bunny siblings learn about saving and spending. They go shopping for their grandmother’s birthday present and learn just how quickly money can slip through your fingers.

Although the bunnies have enough money for the gifts, they have to call their grandmother to pick them up because there’s nothing left for the bus ride home. This book comes with play money so kids can practice counting and spending as they read.

2. A Bargain for Frances

Part of Russell Hoban’s “Frances” series, this story teaches children how to handle clashes between friendship and finances. In the story, Frances wants a beautiful tea set she sees at the store. After her friend Thelma tricks her and buys the tea set herself, Frances has to decide how to respond.

While adults may not all approve of Frances’ response, this story illustrates the importance of honesty and the value of forgiveness. It’s also a good launching point for adults to talk to kids about the role money should play in friendship.

3. The Bright and Shining Breadboard

Written by Rosalys Hall, this story is set in the early 1700s and tells the tale of a Puritan farmer in search of a wife. His mother advises him to marry someone whose breadboard is clean because a clean breadboard is a sign of good housekeeping.

This story is a lot of fun to read with kids because of the historical differences and the farmer’s funny journey. It’s also a great opportunity to discuss the finances it takes to support a family and how being responsible in one area of life helps you become responsible in other areas as well.

4. Isabel’s Car Wash

This children’s book tells the story of a girl named Isabel who wants to buy a beautiful doll. To earn enough money for her purchase, she asks her friends to lend her money to help her start a car washing business. After working hard, she’s able to pay her friends back and save just enough to meet her goal.

Coauthored by former U.S. Assistant of the Treasury Sheila Bair, this story introduces children to basic financial concepts like saving, investing, and sales tax in simple language they can understand. This story also illustrates how much people can achieve when they work together.

5. The Quiltmaker’s Gift

This beautifully illustrated children’s book tells the story of a woman who gives brightly colored quilts to those in need. When a rich king wants one of her quilts, she tells him he can only have one if he first gives away everything he owns. The king follows her advice and learns the value of giving over receiving.

Written by Jeff Brumbeau and illustrated by Gail Dean Marcken, this story sparks questions about wealth and morality. Adults can use this story to help kids understand what real wealth means and how to use what they’ve been given responsibly.

6. The Ordinary Princess

Authored by M. M. Kaye, this fairytale describes the life of a princess who is unfortunately rather ordinary. After her parents try to hire a dragon to help her find a husband, she runs away and finds a job as a kitchen maid at a faraway palace. Of course, it’s only a matter of time before she is discovered.

The themes in this story include courage, the value of hard work, and the importance of being authentic. Adults who read the story with kids can help them consider the main character’s choices and how they impacted those around her.

7. The Tale of Despereaux

This children’s classic by Kate DiCamillo describes the journey of a small mouse with high ideals. Other important characters include a rat with a bitter heart, a princess who is missing her mother, and a housemaid who just wants to be loved.

Kids will find many lessons on responsibility in this story, including the powerful relationship between choices and their consequences. The way grief and fear can impact actions and interfere with relationships is also a prime theme.

8. The Cloud Spinner

In this children’s book, a wise boy spins clouds into beautiful cloth. After a greedy king demands more and more of these soft garments, the kingdom experiences a drought from the lack of clouds. It’s only after the princess gives back the clothes that balance is restored to the kingdom and rain falls again.

Written by Michael Catchpool, this story describes the dangers of greed and how taking too much for yourself can harm others. Adults can also use this opportunity to discuss the princess’s choice and the king’s relationship with his community.

Lead by Example

Reading books to teach kids responsibility and financial wellness is a great way to help them develop character and start to make good choices on their own. In addition to giving kids role models, books are also a fantastic way to have discussions on these topics.

Start with this list of children’s books, and then expand your library to include many more. Your kids will soak up these stories and the lessons they provide.

Supporting Learning at Home

With so many students facing the possibility of remote instruction every day, many parents are wondering what more they can be doing at home to give their children the support they need to be successful. We've put together some tips and resources, catered specifically to the unique times we all find ourselves in.

1. Digital Literacy

Some skills are universal. They apply to virtually every subject area, and to students' personal lives as well as academics. Living in the technology-heavy 21st century means that students need to become fluent in digital literacy. This means developing a wide range of skills, all of which have to do with technology. From being able to create digital materials, to evaluating the validity of an article, digital literacy refers to one’s ability to use technology to interact and communicate.

2. Mindfulness

One of the most useful universal skills for anyone is mindfulness. Mindfulness is related to metacognition, or a person’s ability to think about what and how they think. Mindfulness, however, is more involved than metacognition. When someone is being mindful, they are fully aware of what they are doing in the present moment and why. They are able to look at situations objectively and with a clear head, and can avoid becoming overly reactive or emotional. It sounds simple, but it’s surprisingly difficult even for many adults. The more students can practice mindfulness, the stronger they’ll be at self-regulating, avoiding stress, and having healthy and positive day-to-day interactions with others. Guided mindfulness meditations are a great way to begin building this skill.

3. Life Skills

Don’t underestimate the importance of simple life skills like cooking, managing money, and having a basic knowledge of first aid. As schools place more emphasis on reading, writing, math, and technological fluency (all of which are vitally important, we don’t deny it!), students are starting to lose much of their foundational knowledge of things like balanced eating and financial literacy. Take it back to basics at home by helping your child build some of these skills he or she may be lacking.

4. STEM Learning

STEM stands for Science, Technology, Engineering, and Math; many schools integrate these four sought-after subjects (some places now offer STEAM classes, which also integrate the Arts). The NASA website has a great resource for at-home STEM exploration, which any "left-brained" thinker will love.

5. Encourage creativity by helping students think outside the box

“Thinking outside the box,” or the ability to problem-solve using creativity and critical thinking, isn’t something students learn easily. There aren’t any one-off lessons that will instantly turn a child into a critical thinker. But there are ways we can help students to build those skills over time. Encourage independent play. Set your children up with projects, even if it just means giving them a pile of clean recyclables and challenging them to build something. Most importantly, be careful how you respond to the way your child approaches a task. We are often quick to correct our children when they “color outside the lines,” both literally and figuratively. Just because children don’t execute a task the way we expect them to doesn’t mean they are doing it “wrong.” Be careful what you correct. Those times when children approach a task differently are often the times they grow the most cognitively!

6. Prioritize play (looks different at different ages and grades)

Everyone knows that play is important for all ages. But not all play is created equal! Educational play looks very different for a preschooler than it does for a high schooler, but both are equally beneficial. Playing video games is not going to be as useful for a kid's brain as playing a game that requires strategy and organization. At the same time, not all video games are bad! It’s important that some of your child’s downtime be spent engaged in educational “play," but be proactive in monitoring and guiding what that play looks like.

7. Don't double dose "dry" academics

One of the best-intentioned but least productive ways to support kids with their learning is to just make them do more of what they already find boring. This is not going to make them learn it any faster or any better, and is more likely to actually frustrate them more! Instead, if there are subjects that your child is either struggling with or dislikes, try to help them find a "way in." If your child hates math but loves sports, take their math work outside and play a game of math soccer. Or change all their word problems to be sports-related. Supporting academics at home should be about piquing interest and fueling curiosity, not piling on the work!

Vocabulary Fundamentals

Vocabulary sometimes gets a bad rap—and with good reason. Historically, students learned vocabulary by memorizing the spelling and definitions of long lists of words. Their teacher would quiz them on it, then they would usually never use those words again. But when a teacher does it right, vocabulary instruction can be an instrumental part of a student’s journey toward reading mastery. So what are the components of good vocabulary instruction and why do they matter?

Orthographic Mapping

We’ve been over orthographic mapping before, but here’s a quick refresher. Orthographic mapping is the process by which students match the sounds in words to the symbols that represent those sounds. Instead of memorizing the spelling of long lists of words, the most efficient way to actually learn new words is through repeated decoding. Experts agree that it takes most neurotypical readers 1-4 times to solidify words into memory in this way. Once the spelling of a word has been solidified, the student can recall that spelling when needed.

Affixes and Root Words

Once students understand that most words consist of parts (like affixes), it becomes much easier for them to learn to segment those words. The most efficient approach to learning the meaning of multisyllabic words is to first learn the meaning of common prefixes and suffixes. Students then use the meaning of these short chunks to deduce the meaning of the larger words in which they appear. This takes far less time and effort than memorizing spellings and meanings of entire multisyllabic words in isolation.

Book Embedded Vocabulary Instruction

When students learn new vocabulary, the best way to teach it is through context. Book embedded vocabulary instruction is a strategy in which teachers strategically select targeted vocabulary words from a text before students read it. Teachers choose words that students are less likely to know and that are important to their understanding of the text. Before reading, students preview the vocabulary words, including a student-friendly definition and some examples. Then they immediately hear or see them in the context of the reading, where they are able to further deepen their understanding of the words based on the context in which they appear.

Multisensory Vocabulary Instruction

There are vocabulary words that inevitably need to be taught explicitly, such as domain-specific words in Math or Science. The most effective ways to teach these words is through a multisensory approach. Merely presenting the word with a definition is not enough. In order to gain a thorough understanding of any new vocabulary words, students need examples, anecdotes, visuals, and plenty of opportunity for practice. This could mean using the word in writing or actually applying the word to a process or practice. 

When students are able to learn and interact with new vocabulary words through frequent and dynamic activities like the ones listed above, they are most likely to make the greatest gains in literacy.

First Session Tips

How you present the start of a new tutoring endeavor to your child can make or break his or her experience. Tutors have tons of tools for starting sessions off on a positive foot. However, a positive tutoring experience starts even before the first session. Here are some of the Do’s and Don’t’s of telling your children they’ll be getting some extra help.

1. Don’t make tutoring a punishment

The decision to begin tutoring for your child may come from any number of places. Perhaps his teacher has expressed concern over an academic area. Perhaps he is having trouble completing assignments, or his grades have recently dipped. Whatever the case is, it’s important that the start of tutoring not be presented as a negative consequence for his actions. When students feel that their tutor is there as a punishment, they are much less likely to get anything out of sessions.

2. Give your child some choice

While your child may not have a say in whether she starts tutoring, there are decisions she can be part of. Maybe she will feel more comfortable with a specific gender of tutor. Maybe she would like a say in which day(s) and time(s) she meets for sessions. Giving your child some power over small decisions like these can go a long way.

3. Empower your child’s learning

Bring your children into the conversation around what they need help with. Ask them where they feel like they are struggling and what is feeling hard for them. This sends the message that the tutor is there exclusively to help them. Since they are the ones who will be receiving the support, ask them what they feel they need the most help with! They might be spot on in their self-evaluation. And if they’re not, there are gentle ways of nudging them in the right direction.

4. Give them time to process

You might be tempted to delay telling your child he’ll start tutoring until the last possible moment, but this is likely to backfire. The more time your child has to process, the more likely he is to come to peace with it. That means he’ll be ready, and maybe even excited, be by the time the first session rolls around. Our goal is for every student to look forward to their time with a tutor by creating a space that is supportive, challenging in the right ways, and surprisingly fun.

5. Make tutoring “cool”

Help remove the tutoring stigma. Just because a child receives tutoring does not mean that he or she is dumb, incapable, or otherwise deficient in some way. Some of the world’s most brilliant minds need a little extra support to reach their full potential—and the tutor-tutee relationship has been vital to intellectual development since at least the days of ancient Greece. See if you can find one or two of your child’s friends or classmates who also receive tutoring. Show them it’s not something to be ashamed of, but a gift that will help them become their very best selves!